St. Gregory the Great Seminary (SGGS) was gifted with the presence of 40 young men discerning the call to the priesthood March 11–13. The weekend was aimed mainly at giving the men a look into the daily routine of a seminarian who attends SGGS. When I wasn’t busy with logistical things that come with hosting people, it gave me time to reflect on my own discernment and decision to enter the seminary.
I grew up in a devout Catholic family. Mom and Dad always pushed us in our faith and established a relationship with Jesus Christ and the Blessed Mother as the first priority in our family’s lives. We would normally pray the rosary on road trips, we would never miss Sunday Mass, and because of our dedication to the music ministry at St. Joseph’s in Devils Lake, we normally had to play for various “special Masses” or the Stations of the Cross during Lent. This, in turn, gave me many opportunities to enter into a relationship with Jesus Christ and His Blessed Mother.
As I began high school, the call to the priesthood, which I first heard in the second grade, started to become more real. This came with a certain level of fear. Only a select few of my peers were even willing to take their faith seriously, let alone give their entire life to Christ! There were also personal desires for a beautiful wife, lots of children, a sizeable bank account, a large house, and toys like boats and planes. Having spent a substantial amount of time around good, holy priests at my parish, I knew all of these worldly desires were not a possibility if I answered the priestly call.
One night while I was doing a late-night holy hour with my dad, I was wrestling with this inner turmoil of my will against Jesus’ will for me. Christ prompted me to turn to the Holy Scriptures, to the calling of the first disciples in the Gospel of Matthew. These men, while mending their nets, heard the call from Jesus and without hesitation, got up and followed him. This gave me great comfort that Jesus would never lead me astray, and the disciples’ examples displayed in the fullest sense, a radical trust in Jesus’ will for each and every one of them.
Ever since that night, I’ve been striving to learn how I can more closely follow Christ each day. The first step was to enter seminary, and it was easily one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. Although difficult at times, I feel a deep and profound peace at the seminary and also at peace with the ever-approaching life as a priest. Every single day, the Blessed Mother is leading me closer and closer to Jesus, which is allowing me to conform my own heart after his Sacred Heart.
When I looked at each of the discerners that weekend, I saw every demeanor possible, from a fear of the possibility of a priestly vocation, to a clear and profound peace with it. It was an incredible opportunity for us seminarians to offer words of encouragement, remembering how difficult it was when we all first heard the call.
On the last night, we offered all night adoration for the discerners—my favorite thing on the planet. When the whole world is sleeping, there are no distractions, no noise, and no fear of missing out on what’s going on around you. These hours are when I am most easily able to hear Jesus’ gentle whisper and his beckoning for a more intimate relationship with him. This is when our call can truly be found, whether it’s the call of our vocation or just simply the daily conversion we are all called to each day.
This discernment weekend, although exhausting at times, was truly a blessing, not only for the discerners, but for the seminarians as well. It gave us yet another opportunity to grow closer to Christ’s Sacred Heart, which burns with love for each and every one of us.